Leggings

I would like to clarify that I do not believe that leggings that have the same material composition as pantyhose, that clearly show one's underwear, should every be attempted to be worn as pants. Just don't do it. No on wants to see your thong because you are walking around in a pair of tights that are a size too small.
They should never be worn in the place of pants when paired with Ugg boots and a Northface jacket. Ever.
I believe that leggings have their place. To be worn by almost all people under miniskirts at all times, and under regular above-the-knee skirts when in most polite company. They should be worn under one of those long shirt/dress things with some knee high boots because that looks adorable on just about everyone. If they are made out of a spandex type material, some individuals may wear them under a long shirt, even if that shirt does not fully cover the bum, but at least falls below the belt line on the waist.
Running tights are a wonderful substitute for leggings, especially if you are attempting to wear them as pants. Wearing running tights as the clothing garment on the lower half of your body, even when paired with a t-shirt or athletic top that does not fall below the belt line is acceptable in the following instances: if you are actively running, if you are going to the gym, if you are at the gym, if you are returning home from the gym. Running tights should not be worn as pants with a regular t-shirt in everyday life.

Having said all that, I just ran down to the lake and back, which is ~4 miles. This is a test on my knees, to see how well they have healed due to my extreme lack of running over the past year.
While I would never wear leggings as pants in everyday life, today I feel really super good about my body, and feel as though I COULD.
So here's another picture of my tush. :P

Today I went on an Epic Quest to get bread. I forgot to put bread on my grocery list yesterday, and therefore I, obviously, forgot it at the store yesterday. And since I cannot survive without toast, going back to the store today was completely necessary.
It was mildly warm today, so I decided to just walk to the Pick and Save that is about 2.5 miles away from my house. This allowed me to double task by getting out of my apartment and therefore away form the crippling boredom that lives under my bed, and also get a good chunk of LSD type exercise in. (LSD =/= Acid. In the Exercise world LSD = long, slow distance, which is excellent for converting stored fat into energy). While walking to Pick N' Save, I noticed that the downtown Milwaukee Borders is going out of business (damn you Amazon Kindle, I assume) and everything in the store is on sale. Books on sale? Oh! I was drawn into the store like a moth to a flame! Although the selection was slightly disappointing - about half the store was cookbooks for some reason - I did find an Atlas of Human Anatomy that was different than the one Drew gave my for Christmas, and on sale for $16.00. SIXTEEN DOLLARS?!?! Usually textbook type medical books like that are over $100. So of course, I had to have it. I love books.

It's pretty great. It shows all the anatomy and includes the nerve and blood supply to each muscle! Which is something I need to know.

Got to Pick N' Save and bought my bread, and all that was fairly uneventful. On the way back, I decided not to wait for any crosswalks to give the the little walking man, and weaved my way back and forth through the area, which was perfectly safe, because that is a nice, trendy little area of town, mostly dominated by cafe's, expensive restaurants, and MSOE (Milwaukee School of Engineering - which I find fascinating because that school and Marquette are just integrated into the surrounding city, very unlike The U or Westminster, which are in the middle of the city, but their own separate little islands of school). I got slightly lost, but not really lost, but kind of. Only because I was being silly and forgot momentarily that streets in Milwaukee are not laid out in a nice grid system like at home, so at one point I ended up walking west instead of south like I was when I started on the road. It was ok though, all you have to do if you get lost in that part of town is look for the tall buildings and head towards them, because those are the buildings that line Wisconsin Ave, which is the main street running from the lake westward and cuts through the middle of downtown and the middle of Marquette's campus. It's kind of like the State Street of Milwaukee.
I stopping in at the Milwaukee Public Library, which is open on Sunday, which is shocking to me, I got my tax forms for Wisconsin and thought about how pretty the library looks (three stories and lots of wood furnishings) and how I would like to go wander around it one of these days.

Did I remember my camera while walking around? Of course not. So here is a photo of my pantry:


Hopefully you can accept two pictures today in place for missing a post yesterday. I was at Lita's house until 12:30 am watching Rent and eating mashed potatoes.

Sometimes at home we get that fluffy kind of snow that fall softly and makes the whole world foggy and quiet and beautiful. The kind that makes you want to light and fire and drink tea or hot chocolate and watch movies spread out under a blanket with your lover.

Here, the silence is just kind of creepy.


Also, finally got around to watching New Moon. Why are those movies so bad?

Best desktop background ever. (It's a German Shepherd wearing sled dog booties.)
Taken from this blog:

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/11/dogs-dont-understand-basic-concepts.html

And if you don't find it HILARIOUS, well then, you are a crazy person.

Dear snow, you are utterly unnecessary, please go away.
Physics is hard. I really don't like it.
That is all.

So my Big Bad Semester Project in my Cognitive and Motor Learning class is to learn to juggle.
Seriously?
Seriously.
It's times like these when I love my major.

But it turns out I suck (hardcore) at juggling. I can get down throwing and catching two balls from hand to hand, but when it comes to throwing the third ball, my hand is just like "Ummm.. derp?" And so I end up making this jerky-flaily motion and the ball just stays in my hand. The two times I was actually able to throw the third ball out of my right hand I got so excited that I forgot completely about my left hand and everything comes tumbling down.
Luckily, I am not the only person in my class who can't juggle. Carrie and I spent most of class dropping our balls and exclaiming, "I don't even understand how to do this!!" For those in the class that CAN already juggle, our teacher is making them add a ball.

Never before in my life have I wanted to have grown up in a circus. Juggle six balls? Whatever. Six bowling pins? No big. Six FLAMING bowling pins? Well... the rest of the class is impressed, but I'm still bored.
If not for the ability in of itself, but to see the look on my professor's face and to see what she would make me do then.

I made this up

OK, so I didn't totally make it up, it's a slight variation of my mom's chicken-artichoke pasta, but I'm still pretty impressed.

Chicken Mushroom Artichoke Alfredo Sauce
2 lbs chicken
2 (15 oz) cans artichoke hearts
1 (6 oz) can sliced mushrooms
1 can Cream of Mushroom Soup
1/2 cup half and half
3 cloves garlic (minced)
1 cup grated Swiss cheese
Salt and Pepper

Saute chicken with minced garlic until fully cooked. Add artichoke and mushroom, saute 1-2 more minutes, or until everything is a nice golden brown.
Transfer to large (5 quart) pot.
Add soup, half and half, and 1/2 soup can of water. Add cheese slowly when heated through but not yet boiling, heat until cheese is melted. Add salt and pepper to taste.
Bring to a boil and reduce to a simmer for 10-15 minutes, or until sauce thickens slightly.
Serve over rice, pasta, cooked vegetables, or whatever.

As this sauce ends up being all the same, kind of unappetizing, tanish color, I've been taking a whole carrot to a cheese grater and substituting that for half of the pasta. It looks nicer and is better for you.

Saddest part

Don't get me wrong, I love that Drew makes the effort to find a flower shop in a different state, just to make sure I get something on Valentine's day. I love it, I do. It's thoughtful and kind and he writes very caring messages to go with.

But I just wish his gift lasted more than 5 days before the roses started to die. The frugal I'm-a-poor-college-student-and-I-have-no-money part of me thinks its stupid to spend that much money for flowers that are just going to die.

So I'm attempting to dry half of them out. All the ones that still looked perfect, and had the perfect degree of bloom. Two more are currently being squashed under 5 textbooks and a ream of copy paper. It's been suggested I forget about those for the next 30 to 45 years.

drugs and French Toast

I feel like an old person on the day when I end up taking all my pills at the same time. Here, you can see:
Two 200mg Ibuprofen- last week marked a big step for me, I was able to run three miles, three times during the week and my knee did not hurt. I accredit this lack of grinding pain to the fact that Nichole and I have been regularly lifting weights (coach John style) Monday/Wednesday/Friday for the past month. She's been able to correct my form while squatting and I can literally see (and feel) my left leg getting stronger and the muscle imbalances I had evening out. So I can run on a treadmill without pain now, the only limit is my own intense boredom with running on treadmills. So the day after this amazing step, my plantar fascitis decides to flare up (again). Well fuck. Luckily, this time around I'm in the Athletic Training room everyday and have all sorts of rehab tools at my disposal, most especially, a golf ball. Yeah, a golf ball. You roll it around the bottom of your foot to break up adhesions and scar tissue and it actually feels pretty good. As it is always super slow at times during the spring, I can always recruit one of my classmates to give me deep tissue on the bottoms of my feet. I promise you, this isn't some nice foot rub. It's my classmate finding a cluster of scar tissue (mostly in my heal - which feels disgusting by the way, I can handle it on other people but the fact that it's in MY foot, ew) and digging their thumb into it in order to break it up. Danielle, my CI (clinical instructor and track and field certified athletic trainer, remember?) suggested a three day high-dose regiment of Ibuprofen. A single dose at a single instant works wonders for getting rid of pain, but the medication has to be in your system for at least two days before you get the anti-inflammatory effects. Hence, I am taking a prescription dose (600-800mg) every 6-8 hours - or 200mg every four hours, which I am doing.

Half a Women's Multi-Vitamin: It's got my vitamins A, B, C, D, E, K, thiamin, riboflavin, niacin, folic acid, biotin, pathothenic acid, calcium, iron, iodine, magnesium, zinc, selenium, coper, manganese, chromium, and molybdenum. I really just want it for the vitamin C, calcium, and iron, all those other things are just extra. The only problem is, I get anywhere from 100% - 300% of my daily recommended value per capsule. Once the body reaches 100% of what it needs, it doesn't absorb anymore, and the extra is simply eliminated. Personally, I don't feel like peeing out half to three quarters of the daily vitamin that was over priced to begin with. So I take half a capsule every other day.

Fish Oil - It's full of omega-3 fatty acids and other good forms of fats that are used to make cell membranes and steroid-based hormones and LDL cholesterol (low-density lipoprotein = good) It's also supposed to be good for my heart and joints, and my joints can use all the help they can get.

Also, it's Saturday, and I have nothing to do. No youth soccer, no athlete treatments, nothing. Which explains why I've been sitting around in my PJ bottoms for the past hour and a half. I'm thinking maybe I will do laundry today (I mean, have to do laundry), deep clean my apartment, go grocery shopping (why am I always out of milk?), and maybe go for a walk.
Ok, maybe not go for a walk. It was in the high 30's low 40's all week and now it's back down to 27*F. And it's supposed to snow tonight and tomorrow. Well fuck that.

Oh, hi there grass, it's so nice to see you!

One of these days I'm going to make myself a real dinner, rather than eating some celery at 4:30 when I get back from the training room, a cheese quesodilla at 6:00pm, and a plate of rice at 7:30pm while I read EKGs.
Or not. I mean, small meals are what I'm supposed to be doing right?

My body is actually tired from the workouts I've done this week. My mind isn't tired though. So all I really want to do is like, lay on the floor and listen to P!nk.

Post #400

Nichole and I made cupcakes because we are both at the point in our lives where if we don't get some chocolate in our systems WE WILL DIE. As you can see, I decorated two Valentines-y ones, a "bee" mine, a skull and crossbones, and yep, that would be an ovum complete with Chromosome, golgi apparatus, lysosome, peroxisome, free floating ribosomes, mitochondria (it matches your mom's you know), and microtubules.

Sometimes, I imagine I will look at my mom right after the birth of my child and go "Wow, his/her mitochondiral DNA looks just like yours!" And I will laugh, and my mom will laugh, and Sarah would laugh, and my doctor and the nurses would laugh. And Drew wouldn't get it, but maybe he should have paid attention in high school.

But I like his note the most:
"Another year that we are apart, but it's another year I love you the same. I miss you so much and I wish that we could be together. I will see you in a few short weeks. I love you and don't freeze. Andrew."

Drew's Valentine's Day gift.
Stunningly romantic aren't I?

I'm listening to Vitamin C's Smile.
Yep.

Happy Birthday Ozwald

I've had you for five years today.
I miss you mighty lizard.

This cereal is good.
Like, dangerously good.
But I needed some goddamn chocolate, you know?

Post

Got bored last night.
Played with Crayola Markers.
It's what I do.

Today, Danielle (Track ATC) is in Illinois with the team. As I am the Junior that is currently assigned to Track, she told me that I am in charge of all the track athlete's rehabs today. She's left me generally what she wants each of them to do, but lately she's been letting me decide what exercises people will do, in what order, how many sets, etc. It's so great to know that she trusts me, and feels I am competent enough to do this, because it's not something all of my fellow Juniors have gotten to do.
And while I can't do -anything- if Lauren (soccer ATC) isn't in the athletic training room, it's still fun to pretend I'm running the show.

I keep things I like next to my kitchen table/desk.

Inside Michelle

If you can wake up in a different time, in a different place; can you wake up as someone else?
I really love the movie Fight Club.

As it is fucking cold, I simply let Inside Michelle wander around my apartment for a few hours last night.
Sometimes, I wonder what I would do if I woke up one day and realized that the past four years had all been a dream; that I was still working at Smiths (the first time), still in high school. I wonder what I would do when I walked into work, saw Drew... and he had no idea. How differently would I lead my life?

At home, when it's sunny, it means it will be warm.
In Milwaukee, the sun means nothing. There's a Weather Alert in place because of the windchill, which is currently -3* F. It's the kind of cold that instantly makes any exposed skin sting and ache.

However, it is already a week into February, which means it is going to hit the peak of cold soon, and slowly, slowly start to warm up again. This winter wasn't even that bad. It's gone by so fast.

Ever since last June I've kind of just...
...
Today walking home from class it hit me, really hit me, officially, fully, completely... that my Grandma Shirley is dead.
And up until now I've just been... uncomprehending that she's not still there. Until now I've just kind of assumed she will be there the next time I go home.
But she wont.

Is this what grieving feels like?

I want to be angry. I want to scream at God, or a goddess, or the universe, or whatever cosmic force that this isn't fair.

I want my Grandma back.

But I know that this is nobody's fault. I'm not religious enough to blame some higher being, I'm scientific enough to know that everything and everyone eventually dies.
If I had to blame anyone, I would have to blame my Grandma for being a smoker and giving herself lung cancer.

But I can't be mad at her.
She was my favorite grandparent.

I don't think she would want me to be crying for her either.

But there has to be something... eternal out there. Right?
Because I refuse to believe that she is gone forever.
I refuse to believe that the essence of her doesn't know that I miss her. I refuse to believe that the hundreds of monarch butterflies that I saw over the course of the summer don't mean something.
I refuse to believe that she doesn't know I still love her. I know she knew.

Whenever I give into my sweet tooth craving and visit the vending machine in the Cramer Hall [Health Sciences] Student Lounge, there is always one bag of candy that is barely still clinging onto it's row. I always pick that candy, whatever it is (once, it was Swedish Fish, once it was Reece's) and therefore end up with the clinger candy and the candy that I actually paid for.
Sometimes, I feel bad for whoever didn't get their candy. It's really not fair that I should get two while they get none.

But at the same time, I feel as if it is The Universe's way of telling me that, every now and then, a little treat is O.K.

This is what was left over from Tuesday and the "snowpolcolypse."
It's snowing again.
Snow day Monday?

Apparently, I'm on of those people who can drink rum and tequila slowly, I don't have to shoot i to get it down and I don't have to pull a face.
Apparently, my balance is good enough pre-alcohol that I can pass a field sobriety test after 6 shots of rum. I don't know if it's fair though, walking heal-toe and touching your nose with outstretched arms are also concussion tests, and we have practiced those in class extensively. Maybe it's just muscle memory at this point.

I keep bringing up animals I want when we are older and Drew just keeps saying I can have them. I hope he realizes that I WILL get these animals, just as I got Ozwald 5 years ago.

-Holy Crap. Ozwald will be FIVE YEARS OLD in 8 days!!-

So far, we have mutually decided that we want:
A Basset Hound
A Great Dane or two
A White Goose or two
A Collie/Labrador/medium sized dog
A turtle

He has told me:
I may get chickens so we don't have to buy eggs.
I may rescue racing Grey Hounds.
I may get a tea cup Pig.
I may get geckos with sticky fingers.
I may have an emu.

There will never be a snake, spider, or bird smaller than a penguin in my house.

I remember when I was in elementary school, I had a friend, Shane, who had like, a million pets. Birds, and two dogs, and three cats, and a snake, and gerbils, and a turtle, and rabbits, and god knows what else. I'm going to grow up and now my children will be the kids with a million pets. I am okay with this. :)

WARNING

MATT. YOU MAY WANT TO SKIP THIS POST. IT CONTAINS THE KIND OF IMAGES I THINK ARE AWESOME BUT MAY MAKE YOU FAINT.

Carry on.

I got to play with real human brains and spinal cords today.
Holy shit, I cannot even explain how cool it was.
I even understand nerve tracts better now.

A list

Things I Must Occasionally Remind Myself:

1) When I am 23, this ring will be on the other hand.
2) When I am almost 24, I will also be looking for a wedding dress.
3) I'm more competent in the Athletic Training Room than I give myself credit for.
4) Drink more milk.
5) I will never be 5'10'' and 125 pounds.
6) That is ok, I work my butt off everyday to look how I do now.
7) I cook my own food, clean my own apartment, and pay my own rent, I'M AN ADULT.
8) As hard as being in Milwaukee is, I was not one of the people who couldn't handle college and went home.
9) I am strong; physically and mentally.
10) He's in love with me, and only me.
11) Even though it's sunny, I still need a scarf.
12) Twice-baked (red) potatoes are totally worth the effort.
12) Floss.
13) Speak up.
14) Not everyone understands the body like I do.
15) Things are difficult now so I can ensure myself a better future.

SNOW DAY

SNOWPOCOLYPSE!
SNOW.M.G!
SNOWTORIOUS B.I.G!
Are just a few of the things I have heard people say about the blizzard we had last night. And trust me, when I say blizzard I mean it.
I walked ONE WHOLE BLOCK to Nichole's house last night to hang out in celebration of our snow day today, and it was exhausting just to get there. Breaking a path from my apartment's back door to the street was hard enough, and when I got there, I stepped on a snow drift and sunk in past my knee! The whole time though, I was thinking about how AWESOME the snow would be if it wasn't blowing so hard it hurt your eyes to look anywhere but straight down. The viability was so bad you could barely even see across the street.
Sometimes, I take this ally/walk way between two other apartments because it's a straight shot to the street, rather than going around the apartments. When I walk there at night, sometimes I worry a hobo is going to reach out and get me. Yesterday when I walked outside I was kind of worried that the ABOMINABLE SNOWMAN was going to come out of nowhere and snatch me up.
I'm a bit sad I didn't get pictures last night, but here are some from what we woke up to:

Here I am standing on the sidewalk outside my apartment. Because of how the wind was blowing, you can see the side walk had to be carved down from about three feet of snow. Behind me, you can see a drift that comes up to my chest.

Here's a picture of someone who was lucky enough to park AFTER the wind. Nichole's poor car has a snow drift up and over half of her hood. They also plowed a line through her parking lot for some reason, putting a 4 foot wall of snow right on the side of her car. She wont be going anywhere for a while.
This is outside my front door. The three parts of the wall you can see are about knee, waist, and shoulder level.

Yeahhh.....

I love that tonight and tomorrow's one-word weather description is "Blizzard."
I love even more that due to this impending "Snowpocolyps" (no, I did not make that up) I GOT A SNOW DAY TOMORROW.
Fuck. Yes.
Cause you know what that means?
No fucking physics.
You know what else that means?
I will be going to Nichole's house around 11pm tonight, getting hammered, and watching SLC Punk, sleeping over on her comfy couch, and then making pancakes in the morning. Irresponsible underage drinking for. the. win.
My classmate Carrie is a lucky duck. Her 21st birthday is tomorrow and now she can actually have fun going out tonight. Do I wish I could go out with the rest of my class because I am one of three not 21 yet? Sometimes. But then I remember they will be stumbling around in the blizzard (lawlz) tonight, and I will be in LAS VEGAS in five months. I can wait. :)

Looking out my window I don't know if it's even snowing right now, but it's very, very windy, so I think it's just blowing what has already fallen around.

Today I got in trouble for something that happened in the training room that I was not a part of. In Iowa, one of our sprinters cramped up really bad during a race. I took care of her there, and was planning on telling Danielle (My CI and the head track and field AT) about it, in person, on Monday when I went into the training room.
Monday: Dave, who was the certified at the meet last weekend, was already in the training room when I got there yesterday, and had already told the sprinter to put ice on her hamstrings for 15 minutes. Danielle was not in the training room at the time I walked in, but got in about 10 minutes after I did. At this point in time, we talked to the sprinter about what happened at the meet, Dave told Danielle that he put his eval of her hamstrings into our computer database. Danielle and sprinter go to talk to the head coach about sprinter not being at practice. Danielle and sprinter come back. At this point in time, I am working with another athlete. Danielle takes sprinter through some rehab, which includes heating her hamstrings and some exercises.
Today, I got an email from Dave saying I should have sent Danielle an email on Sunday telling her about said sprinter. And he's right, I should have. But then he went on about how *I* was having an athlete ice (um, no... *HE* was having the athlete ice when I got there) and how *I* should have told Danielle what Dave's eval and plan for the sprinter was (which he did not tell me and I assumed he told Danielle when he was talking to her when she got there) and how *I* should not let an athlete bully me into getting the treatment she wants and how *I* should have never put heat packs on right after icing. And how it was *MY* fault that all this happened because I did not email Danielle or tell her when she got into the training room that the sprinter had ice on.
Ok...
First of all, yes, I should have emailed Danielle. My bad.
Secondly though. Danielle WALKED IN WHEN THE ATHLETE HAD ICE ON. WE TOLD HER THE ATHLETE HAD JUST ICED BECAUSE DAVE TOLD HER TOO. I guess I was wrong to assume DANIELLE KNEW THE SPRINTER HAD JUST ICED HER HAMSTRINGS.
Third, it is not *my* job as a student to pull Danielle aside and tell her, "Look, Dave did sprinter's eval before I got here and he didn't tell me what his assessment was but he's having her ice." That is Dave's job to relay.
Fourth, I had NO involvement in the athlete's decision to heat. That was 100% Danielle's (a Certified Athletic Trainer and the person I am working UNDER) decision and it happened while I was with another athlete. Danielle said she did not know why Dave had the sprinter ice and did not tell the sprinter to stop heating.

Dave said to call him if I wanted to talk about his email. I would like to put out my side of the story, but I need to figure out how to do so in a non-whiny way. Also, I'm afraid to call Dave, calling him would be weird.